How to Do Less 💩 You Don’t Love

Throw out the to-do list AND the bucket list and do this instead.

I absolutely love the long days of summer. In fact, this Thursday  is the Summer Solstice –the longest day of the year. 

I love how that means I can take Lucy 🐕 out for late evening walks and that John and I can sit outside on the back deck and read our books until almost 9:30 while the sun slowly sets. It’s glorious.

BUT… the problem with long days? Long to-do lists. Somehow because we know summer is fleeting, we feel obligated to cram it full with things to do.

We have already FOMO and summer hasn’t even really started. 🤣

Now, don’t get me wrong… there’s nothing wrong with having some plans (I mean, you know me, I am a planner!) BUT… when you have ten thousand things you want to do in the next 3 months it can make summer fly by waaaaaay too fast. 

I need a nap after just looking at this list. 😂

And it can make summer feel stressful. So, this year let’s do something different. 

Your Anti-Bucket List

Let’s make a list of things you don’t want to do. 

Yes - what not to do. 

I came across this idea for an anti-bucket list when I was researching for the podcast a few weeks ago when we talked about how to feel younger and stop worrying about your age. And I absolutely love it.

After all, in my book On Purpose, I say: 

Knowing what we like is helpful, but knowing what we don’t like, what we don’t want to repeat, is more than helpful— it’s powerful.

I’m all for powerful. What about you?

If I were to send you a text message summarizing this article — this would be it.

So I started thinking about what would go on my own anti-bucket list. And I found myself flittering around the Internet looking for ideas, when I stumbled upon a fashion blog focused on women who don’t really love to shop.

Anyone else out there who hates to shop? Or is that just me? I am good to go into maybe 3 stores before I’m all out of gas and I just cannot possibly look at any more racks of clothes.

Anyway, I started reading the first article which began like something this:

I’ve recently decided to take the word “flattering” out of my vocabulary. It doesn’t matter whether an article of clothing really fits my body - it’s really about taking advantage of the latest trends.

Ummmm. Did I just read that right? You don’t care if the clothes make you feel fabulous/sexy/amazing/whatever… as long as you are on trend? Sorry, but no.

And that’s when I realized item number one on my anti-bucket list:

1 - Stop Wearing Things I Don’t Absolutely Love

I may hate to shop, but I draw the line at wearing clothes that don’t make me feel amazing.

Which then basically lead me to my second item:

2 - Only Buy Products from Companies I Actually Like

My money represents power–buying power. And that means I can actually choose to support people and companies who I like. Full Disclosure: I don’t think every company has to have an activism statement (for the most part, I think most of those are just PR bull💩 anyway). But I can give my money to companies that do what they say and say what they do (one of my own core values). 

Which got me thinking… how do I want to spend my money? And that got me to item #3:

3 - Buy Experiences, Not Things

About a year ago I started a running list of the best moments in my life… in other words, the things that have made me happy, the things that I revisit in my head when I need an emotional boost. Some of them are big (when I told John he was going to be a dad) and some of them are so small, you might miss them (driving on the Blue Ridge Parkway with all the windows down). The list is 8 pages long so far… and do you know how many of these best moments are actually items purchased?? Almost none. 

There are a few, like when I bought myself my dream watch as a way to celebrate a crazy successful launch and when I bought my first house at the age of 23. But even these are more about the experience than the things.

There’s lots of other things on my list… but I’d like you to take a minute and think about your anti-bucket list. What would be on that list?

Quitting is not an end— it’s the first step in refocusing and redefining your life. It allows you to reclaim lost time and is the biggest ally in making time bend to your will.

And that’s what it’s really all about. I want to have more time–or at least feel like I do. 

The Old Practice: Thinking about alllll the things I want to do/need to do which makes me feel like I’m running out of time. 

The New Practice: Focus on what I’ve got… and choose to let go of the rest. That makes for a happier life.

Resources To Help

How To Feel Like You Have More Time

Ever feel stressed for time? Yeah, put that on your anti-bucket list. On last week’s episode, I shared strategies on how to stretch and bend time so you can feel less rushed. Listen on your favorite podcast player or watch it right here:

Track Record of Achievement - last week I shared a download I created to help you implement those strategies to create more time for yourself. If you didn’t grab it, go do that now! It will make a huge difference in your day.

Here’s the truth: If you live your life trying to avoid disappointing others, you’ll end up only disappointing yourself.

Stop filling up your calendar with things, start crossing some things off. After all, when you are at a buffet, sometimes you have to choose to skip a few of tasty-looking side dishes to make more room for the shrimp cocktail. 

Let go of what doesn't serve you and save room for the good stuff my friend. 

3 Random (Fun) Things

Here’s a few things I’ve been doing, thinking, or reading about this week…

🍳Currently Cooking: I’m completely obsessed with these Coconut Almond Energy Bites. Actually K and John are obsessed with them… I’m just fully making them on repeat every other week because those two can’t stop using them as an afternoon snack. They’re super quick and simple to make. Here’s a couple of tips: Sub almond butter for peanut butter… and wear gloves otherwise it can feel like it’s a mess. (But totally worth it!)

📚What I’m Reading: I just finished reading The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue and absolutely LOVED it. In the past month, I’ve read about 8 books (thank you vacation week!) but that’s probably one of my favorites I’ve read recently. 

🍨Favorite Summer Treat: These have been my go-to evening treat. I love that they are mini size, so it feels like I’m having a decadent dessert… and because they’re all natural, they are guilt-free. #winning