Chainsaws, Childbirth and Choices
Why Bad Decisions Are Sometimes Good
Ever wondered where chainsaws come from?
No?
I guess it’s just me that wonders weird things like that 🤣 but the answer might actually surprise you. (And make you cringe.)
Childbirth.
Chainsaws were invented for childbirth. (I did mention you might cringe.)
In 1780, two Scottish doctors invented the hand-cranked chainsaw to cut through the pelvises of women who were struggling to push their babies out during delivery.
Let’s just take a moment to pause and realize anesthesia was not invented until 1846… over 60 years later.
Not all decisions are good decisions.
Last week on the podcast, we talked about making confident decisions and I shared my process I call The Decision Donut. One of the things we talked about was the fact that there are no perfect decisions. All we can do is make the BEST choice out of the information we have.
I loved the emails I got from so many of you commenting on the podcast title this week (The Power of Imperfect Decisions). Because truly decisions–no matter how much information you have–are always imperfect.
3 Reasons to Be Happy with Imperfect Decisions
Thank God for Unanswered Prayers
So often we pray and beg and bargain with God so we can have the things we want. But sometimes what we want isn’t what we need. Ugh. That’s hard to admit.
But that guy I dated for 2 years who I thought I wanted to marry? Yeah, thank goodness that didn’t work out. Oh, and the guy before him… and the guy before that. Well, you get the picture.
We like to think we know the difference between what’s good and bad… but we truthfully don’t really know. I talked about this quite a bit on the podcast; it’s been a journey to let go of judging my decisions in the moment. But ( I know I’ve alluded to this before):
We don’t know a good decision in the moment.
We only know it afterwards–sometimes years or even decades later. Some of my worst decisions have led me to some of the best things in my life. I’ve stopped praying to make the right decision. Now I simply pray to make the decision that is for my highest and greatest good. (And that actually helps make decisions less stressful.)
We Can’t Control Everything
Sometimes I like to play a game where I work backwards through all the choices and decisions that had to be made in order for me to be where I am. Take John, for example.
I never would have met John if I hadn’t bought my house at the age of 23 (CHOICE) using money I’d earned singing on stages (CHOICE) as a kid.
But he never would have moved in if my amazing next door neighbor Lisa wasn’t engaged to a jerk (CHOICE) who decided to cheat on her 3 months before their wedding (CHOICE) which caused Lisa to break off the engagement (CHOICE) and go buy a house of her own. (ANOTHER CHOICE) She just happened to mention that her little rental would be available (CHOICE) to a friend from high school who just happened to be named John Dalton.(CHOICE)
The story of how I married my next door neighbor sounds so simple.. But look at all those choices that had to happen! Most of them were not mine at all…
See Everything You Added to Your Backpack?
People say you need to forgive yourself for your mistakes.
I think that’s all wrong.
You need to thank yourself for the decisions you’ve made in the past. Yes, even the bad ones.
As we talked about, it’s easy to judge our choices with the benefit of hindsight. Of course I see now that the guy I wanted to marry was a terrible fit for me and didn’t really align with who I wanted to be. But staying with him for 2 years wasn’t a bad decision. I learned a lot about what I wanted (and a helluva lot about what I didn’t).
We talk a lot about your backpack–how we constantly add in our wins and achievements, our failures and our mistakes. All of that adds up to a lot of wisdom, doesn’t it? Making bad decisions is just another way to add some serious smarts to our backpack.
Of course, we should be grateful for all the good choices we’ve made. But let’s not negate the bad choices–a lot of good comes from those too.
The Old Practice: Judging ourselves based on our decisions and our ability to somehow (with just the use of a Magic 8-Ball) know the right choice.
The New Practice: Realize that all the decisions you made in the past were made using the limited information you had at the time.
Resources To Help
Last week I shared a process for feeling more confident with making decisions. And I included a downloadable online Decision Making Machine. It’s customizable so it works no matter what choice you are struggling to make.
The Power of Imperfect Decisions
John and I talked about how to feel more confident with your decisions including how we walked Jack through the his biggest decision so far: how to choose where to go for college. (This is probably the thing I got the most emails about last week!) Listen to last week’s episode on your favorite podcast player or watch it right here:
Here’s the truth: Even bad decisions are good.
I don’t know about you, but I’m grateful for my imperfect life. After all, it’s lead me here to you. And isn’t that something?
3 Random (Fun) Things
Here’s a few things I’ve been doing, thinking, or reading about this week…
🍳Currently Cooking: I make a batch of my Coconut Maple Granola at least twice a month. Now that the weather is finally so nice, I love eating a small bowl of it while I sit outside on my back deck in the mornings. When I travel, I actually bring this granola with me because I love it so much.
📚What I’m Reading: Thanks to the recommendations you all left here, I just read Remarkably Bright Creatures. I absolutely loved it - it tells such a deep story of loneliness and hope. I literally tore through all 355 pages on a rainy Saturday - what a perfect day. Thanks @Rachel Yaceczko for recommending it!
🤩Obsessed With: This Honey Chai Tumeric Tea has been my go to for the past few weeks. With a little almond milk and some local honey infused with vanilla my mom got me, and I’ve got the perfect thing to drink outside while I take my afternoon break. Right now the weather has been in the 70s and I absolutely love watching the mountain behind my house slowly change green as we get closer to mid-May.
Don’t forget! I’m giving away gifts this month to celebrate my birthday! To get a gift, simply refer your friends to Not Rocket Science. Your unique sharing link can be found here. Thank you for your support and love - it means a lot.
I cannot believe the chainsaw thing. Like really, people!